Turkey Registration Station & Walmart

I've been wanting to blog for a while. But you know how it is. Life is busy. There's planning to do. There's planning to avoid. There's grading to do. There's grading to avoid. There are lunches to make, laundry to wash, floors to vacuum. I could go on and on. But you know how it is.

This weekend I've finally got something that I simply MUST blog about. So, I'm taking the time out of my grading avoidance to make an entry. There are 2 striking occurances I must share:

"the turkey registration station"

This fowl registration was taking place at the tiniest gas station I have ever seen. The one cop for the 'town' was there. But the thing that really made this particular gassing up experience noteworthy was the woman with a dog in her front seat. She was wearing too tight jeans and tall black pointy toed, thick-heeled boots. She was carrying a case of Mountain Dew & a case of Miller Lite. She opened her trunk and voila--there was an ice chest ready to receive the beverages so she could continue on her way. Classy.

"walmart"

Today Kurt & I wanted to buy some new fish. We love our fishtank and find it to be a very relaxing addition to our living room. We had a severe case of Ick in the tank and so many fish funerals were held in months previous. We've finally got the tank under control and have been watching it carefully for about a month now. We were down to one sad, lonely fish. We were ready to bring some new friends home.

The Walmart in Milwaukee is ghetto. To be honest, it's the worst Walmart I've ever seen. It has a nail salon inside. No one was working on the entire south side of the store, which is the side the fish are on. For the first time ever, the fish we wanted were actually there and they didn't look to have any diseases. Also, there were no dead fish in the tank already. Always a good sign. Do you think we could find anyone to help us? No. Do you think after we had someone page (because of course the person in the blue vest that says: "CAN I HELP YOU?" could not in fact help us) for help in the pet department twice that anyone came to assist us? No.

We left the ghetto-fabulous Walmart and went across the street to the pet store. They too carry the kind of fish we wanted but they were about $5 more expensive. Back to Walmart we went. Now I was very irritated and went up to the Customer Service Manager and said: "we have been waiting for about 20 minutes and no one has helped us. We have had an associate paged three times now. Do you think someone can help us?" The very dear Customer Service Manager was SO helpful. She paged an associate.

Good. We waited another 10 minutes for this mysterious associate to actually come to the fish area. Of course this person never came. And so, since I have seen Walmart associates bag fish to sell on more than one occassion, I rooted around their fish counter to find the plastic bags. I marked on the bag the UPC of the fish I wanted as well as the number I was purchasing. I got the little bucket and filled it with water. I was nervous about getting caught scooping out my own fish, but finally decided that it would be hard to get caught since no one works on that side of the store and (as I'm sure you've surmised by now) no one was coming to assist us with the fish. I took the net from under the counter, scooped out my fish and dumped them in my bag.

The Lord helps those who help themselves...
to the fish.

I can't help feeling a little badass for getting my own fish out of the tanks at Walmart. Walmart, suck my shorts.

That's all for today's events. Until next time.